Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Every morning you wake up, you wake up YOU.  Whenever you look in the mirror, there you are!  It is insane to dislike and disrespect that person in the mirror. 
Dr. Mitchell Perry

 1. Your character, your standards, and your self-respect are everything.

Do you ever notice that every morning you wake up YOU? Even if you are dreaming... you still wake up YOU. You are always there regardless of your fantasies about being someone else. 

I like to say, "Wherever you go, there you are, so there you go!" 

This means that every morning you look in the mirror, there you are. 

Therefore, you will always be attending that meeting with yourself... so it makes perfect common sense to enjoy and feel good about what you see in the mirror. 

It is insane to routinely dislike the person always attending that party - YOU.

So, your judgment, your approval, your self-respect, your self-concept is primary. Therefore to be hostage to the approval / disapproval of others over your own is profoundly counter-productive.

2. The degree to which you get respect from others is in direct proportion to your own self-respect. The more self-respect you have... the more respect you will get from others.

Remember that being respected has a much longer shelf-life than being popular.

Popular falls in and out of fashion. People are often fickle and your being hostage to the approval / disapproval of others only makes you perpetually adjust your standards and conduct in the interest of gaining that temporary favor.

Example: you get pressure from your peers to participate in doing drugs because "it is cool, everyone is doing it, and you want to avoid being called a wimp." So to get group approval you consent, do the drugs, and then later regret it big time.

Sometimes you have to do the "right" thing because your self-respect is at stake. When you do, you respect what you see in the mirror, and then "they" will likely respect you more.

Remember, "like" follows "respect" more than "respect" follows "like."
It is more likely that people will like you after they respect you than they will respect you after they like you. I would always much prefer to be respected than be popular. 

In your lifetime, you have known someone who always chose the "popular" option and as a result their self-respect always went on the back burner... so they earned very little, if any respect from others.

3. Going forward, consider using the "SELF-RESPECT BAROMETER©."

You know what a barometer measures: air pressure. And as you may know, boaters always check the barometer first before they venture out into the sea.  If the barometer indicates a "storm" coming, it might be a bad idea to go out in bad weather.

So consider this... you probably wear a watch... and you probably routinely look at your watch to check the time... that helps you make important decisions at particular points in the day.

Let's imagine that you NOW have an additional gauge on your watch... and this one is called your "SELF-RESPECT BAROMETER©"... and it measures your self-respect at any time.

So imagine you are going to make a decision about a relationship, an initiative, a purchase, a reaction, etc... and this decision has some emotion attached to it... which means this next decision might be impacted by that emotion.

Perhaps you might be dealing with impulse control issues around this decision and your emotions are impacting your impulses... SO, BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY MAKE THE DECISION, YOU SIMPLY CHECK YOUR WATCH AND LOOK AT YOUR "SELF-RESPECT BAROMETER©."


And, if the answer is DOWN, then you can decide to make another decision instead. Imagine your self-respect is always the guiding light, the guidance counselor, the mentor, the internal locus of control.


Then you start trusting your judgment more.

Keep the "Self-Respect Barometer©" close by, and look at it often. You will notice that it will help you make important decisions, retain your strength of character, and self-respect.

Today's Tickle

A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.
After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts.
She repeats this gesture about five more times.
When she is about to hand him another batch again he asks the little old lady, 'Why don't you eat the peanuts yourself?'
'We can't chew them because we've no teeth', she replied.
The puzzled driver asks, 'Why do you buy them then?'
The old lady replied, 'We just love the chocolate around them.'